Before my husband and I got married, he swore that he would never agree to ever getting a family pet. Despite having grown up in a house full of animals, I was fine with this decision because a) I assumed I could change his mind if I wanted to and b) I had grieved the loss of so many beloved pets in my lifetime that I had zero interest in becoming attached to another one.
So of course nobody was more surprised than me when my daughter started asking for a pet hamster and my husband casually suggested that “maybe we should get a dog instead.”
Even after 15 years together, the man still has the power to shock the heck out of me.
Ironically, I turned out to be the parent who was less than enthusiastic about bringing an animal into our already hectic household. I did not want a dog. Or a hamster. Or a fish. Or any other type of animal that would create more work and responsibility for me.
Here’s the thing: I’m finished having babies. My children sleep through the night. They can dress themselves, bathe themselves and, when necessary, make themselves dinner. (Sure, it’s cold cereal or microwave mac & cheese, but hey, that counts.)
After years of intense, all-in attachment-style parenting – breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping, always putting my children’s needs ahead of my own – these things are HUGE. Suddenly, I’m at a point in my life where I am able to work, sleep, grocery shop and use the restroom in peace. Why would I want to introduce another baby – human or fur – into this finally blissful existence?
I didn’t. And yet, last month, because I love my kids and I’m a pushover and I was still in shock that my husband was agreeing to the idea in the first place, we brought this little guy into our lives:
And I am, of course, already head over heels in love with him. Some days, I feel exactly like I have another baby in the house.
Bruiser is a sweet, shy rescue dog who weighs about 8 pounds and wants nothing more than to curl up under a blanket in any available lap. He cannot feed himself, bathe himself or see to his own bathroom needs. He prefers to be carried everywhere. He eats things off the floor. He follows me around the house constantly, always wanting my undivided attention while I’m trying to get things done.
In the past month, I’ve spent hours reading dog food labels and learning how to make your own. I’ve purchased doggie sweaters. I’ve researched pet vets and immunizations, and had way too many phone conversations with my husband about this dog’s bowel movements and bathroom habits. If you take a look at my search history, you will find several entries related to “health benefits of coconut oil for dogs.”
I might be going overboard. Just a bit.
What I’ve discovered, though, is that maternal instincts are powerful things and – in my brief experience at least – they do not discriminate against babies of the animal variety. Like it or not, I’m still very much in mom mode, and I can’t help but enjoy taking care of this little guy who depends on me so completely.
However, the really amazing thing about Bruiser is that – even though he might be like a baby in so many ways – he is NOWHERE NEAR AS DEMANDING AS A REAL BABY WOULD BE.
This, I think, is his real appeal.
Bruiser climbs happily into his doggie bed every night and sleeps until the rest of us get up in the morning. He doesn’t cry. He loves to snuggle, but doesn’t complain when you have to put him down. He can be left at home by himself. And he can’t talk, which means he can’t find five thousand things I’ve done wrong to complain about. (My children, on the other hand, seem to think it is their life’s mission to draw attention to my flaws and failings on a daily, if not hourly, basis.)
Don’t get me wrong, human babies are wonderful. But I’ve paid my dues, and I still have zero interest in having another one.
I might, however, be open to getting another dog.
We adopted Bruiser through Canines in Crisis, a fantastic rescue organization based in Jefferson County, and he has been the perfect addition to our family. If you are considering a pet for your family, keep in mind that there are many rescue animals throughout the St. Louis area looking for a place to call home.
Photos: Alyssa Chirco
Alyssa Chirco is a freelance writer, mother and margarita lover, not necessarily in that order. In addition to writing for STL Parent, she is Contributing Editor at Parenting Squad, and covers parenting, health and lifestyle topics for publications across the country. She recently moved from the suburbs of St. Louis to a small town in rural Jefferson County, where she is learning to survive with no Target or Starbucks in sight. Follow her on Twitter @AlyssaChirco
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