Advice for Mom-To-Be Snooki

Congratulations on your little bundle of joy, Snooki!

I know there are a lot of jokes going around about how your due date coincides with the Mayans’ prediction of the end of the world, but don’t let that get you down, girlfriend.

In all honesty, I feel a sort of kinship with you. My name is Nicole, too! And I also subscribe to the GTL philosophy – except not in that order and without the G and T. So for those reasons, I wanted to give you a little head’s up on what you can expect when Snooki, Jr. enters the world.

New club wear – I know taking a baby out clubbing isn’t always the “socially appropriate” thing to do, but when a mom’s gotta dance, a mom’s gotta dance, right? My trick when I went clubbing was to stick with a Baby Bjorn as opposed to a wrap. It’s not nearly as sexy as a wrap – which looks fierce with UGG boots and a trucker hat – but when you’re grinding to LMFAO on the dance floor, you really want a carrier that’s going to give you and Junior the support you need when you do a pantiless cartwheel.

A short wingman. Shortly after giving birth, you may notice Junior leaving the beach house in the evenings. When that happens, check to see if The Situation is pushing around a stroller. Flashing one’s abs and talking about yourself in the third person can only get you so far with the ladies – The Situation needs a new come-on in his repertoire, and let’s face it, few women -  myself included - can resist a man with a baby, even if he is a gigantic tool (the man, not the baby).

“That mom.” I know you’ve had experience with fights inside Karma, but nothing can prepare you for your first altercation with “that mom” in your Jersey Shore mom’s group – the one who swings into the playdate high on Starbucks and homemade scones after taking her nine-month-old to Mandarin/chess/harpsichord lessons.

If you don't breastfeed for a reason, she'll likely expect an explanation when you break out the formula, and you may have to defend your C-section if your birth experience isn't au natural. What’s more – “that mom’s” not confined by restrictive, clingy club attire – she’s come prepared for a fight in designer yoga pants.

But more often than not, you will meet incredible fellow moms who will be your right hand women through all the challenges you’ll face in motherhood.

Yes, I am ribbing you a little bit, Snooki, but I think you’re going to surprise everyone by being a great mom. I’ve “met” your parents through E! True Hollywood Story, and the Polizzi family appears to be full of love for one another. There are plenty of moms like you, who have done the partying thing and are ready to settle down with a sweet little baby. Just ask my friend – a former Vegas bartender who now hauls around three kids in a Town & Country.

And really, I think – well hope – a lot of “Snooki” is for the camera. In my mind, Nicole actually spends her Friday nights watching Downtown Abbey on the DVR and circling homemade cleaning solutions in Real Simple. Just like this Nicole.

So, in closing, let me say good luck to you Snooki. I’ll be picking up some self-tanning baby lotion today for your shower gift.

By Nicole Plegge, Lifestyle Blogger for SmartParenting