Breastfeeding Dads and Rainbow-Pooping Dolls: The Most Bizarre Mom's Happy Hour Ever

The poop on the hottest toys

There’s been an explosion of dolls and their pets dedicated to what Gwyneth Paltrow would pretentiously refer to as diurnal expulsion. 

First there was the Potty Trainin’ Taffy Barbie Doll which makes picking up dog excrement both color-coordinated and glamorous. It’s true - we girls can do anything!

But weirder still are Moxie Girlz and their pet unicorns – pet unicorns who poop rainbows!  Colorful, Fruit Stripes Gum-tinted nuggets that look like jelly beans and will no doubt embed themselves in your carpet.

The Huffington Post gathered together the most brilliant reviews from Amazon, hailing the magical unicorn and lambasting TM, the manufacturer of Moxie Girlz, for its lack of attention to realism. Said one reviewer, “Pooping rainbows is one thing, but if it doesn’t also fart moonbeams and sunshine, then really it’s only half a unicorn.”

My four-year-old continues to beg for her own Moxie excrement adventure. Well, sweetheart, there’s a magical world of dog poop for you to explore in our backyard. I’ll even bedazzle your pooper scooper so you can bask in the excitement Moxie and Barbie have promised you. I bet the waste will even be rainbow-colored if your dog continues to eat the Play-Doh you neglect to put away.

Now on top of her talent, hair and ability to wear dark lipstick, I also envy Lorde’s confidence.

This week, 17-year-old singer Lorde blasted the media for altering her photos. The tabloids didn’t feature her in “Worst Beach Bodies” or “Stars Without Makeup” – instead she was aggravated that outlets Photoshopped out her acne.

Through her Twitter feed, she posted side-by-side photos taken of the same show and remarked, “i find this curious – two photos from today, one edited so my skin is perfect and one real. remember flaws are ok :-)”

Publicity mongering or not, it’s refreshing to see a teen star embrace her imperfections and enforce the importance of strong self-esteem in the girls who look up to her.

Those who want to squash the conspiracy theories that claim Lorde is really 38 years old (which I lean toward – no high schooler should be able to craft lyrics like those. My 17-year-old poetry was limited to finding a word that rhymed with Bon Jovi), may have ammunition that proves Lorde is another teen besieged by hormones. I hate to break it to you – but my middle-aged acne can throw down with a teenage breakout any day.

The best toddler tantrums are now in the bookstore

The blog Reasons My Son is Crying has provided well-needed laughs to exhausted parents on the receiving end of their toddlers’ nonstop temper tantrums. When your child throws a fit because the chorus of Bastille’s Pompeii moves too fast to sing along with the lyrics (seriously, every time) and cries when you give her the popsicle she asked for, it’s refreshing to see other parents going through the same trials.

Now the man behind Reasons, Greg Pembroke, has compiled together the best of his blog in the book Reasons My Kid is Crying. He even chronicles why he is crying (maybe because he is forced to open presents with his family while sitting on the toilet).

In an interview with Paste Magazine, Pembroke shared what makes his blog so popular and illuminates why this parenting stuff has gotten so hard: “I think the reason people like my page is because it shows the other side of parenting that you have to see on a daily basis that no one else shares. Everyone loves to share pictures of the homemade Valentine’s they made for the whole preschool class. And I look at that, and now I have to carry around extra guilt because I had them pick out Iron Man ones from the store. I think parents are feeling—there’s so much pressure to make everything perfect all the time.”

Fathers shakes misconceptions to promote breastfeeding

Speaking of dads, one father launched a viral breastfeeding awareness campaign to rally support for moms. Photographer and new dad, Hector Cruz, of Tennessee shot photos of dads holding their babies in “breastfeeding” poses with the tagline, “If I Could, I Would” as part of his Project Breastfeeding campaign.

While the campaign raised some eyebrows, it also raised awareness of the importance of encouraging moms during this occasionally difficult time and breaking the stigma of breastfeeding in public. Research shows that when dad is supportive of mom, she’s more likely to breastfeed, especially if he steps up, whether that means bringing baby to mom in the middle of the night or encouraging her when breastfeeding, or really the breast itself, gets hard.

As much as moms relish the experience of bonding through breastfeeding, there are those nights where we want to say to our significant others: “I Wish You Could and Would.” Especially the one night when I was particularly delirious and yelled at my husband for not nursing our newborn like I asked him to.