As Easy As (Finding Your) Pie

It all hit me the other night.

After a particularly exciting evening of clipping the kids’ toenails and yelling at one child to stop eating her sister’s toenail remnants off the floor, I finally settled on the couch with a copy of Real Simple. The issue featured an article from Beth M. Howard, author of Making Piece: A Memoir of Love, Loss and Pie who found her joy by baking pies.

Her words were touching, at times heartbreaking, and overall inspiring. A former dot.com-er, she now runs a pie stand outside her home in Iowa, which just happens to be the house from American Gothic – because naturally there had to be another level of awesomeness.

The article, of course, left me shaking the magazine at my husband. “How do you do this? How do you find something that makes you this damn content?”

He simply shrugged. “I guess you just need to find your pie.”

As much as a mom appreciates and adores her children, she always feels a slight resentment that her “me” time has disintegrated. Not only is it hard to find time to do the hobbies you once loved, it’s hard to remember what those passions even were.

In between the Girl Scouts events and the soccer practices and the PTO meetings, you get a fleeting memory of that guitar sitting in your attic – the one you were going to use when you launched your all-mom George Michael tribute band. Or the box of yarn that was going to morph into baby blanket for your newborn – who’s now five years old.

If you asked me what my passion is outside of the kids, I’d say it’s watching Portlandia, which is super fun, but doesn’t leave me particularly fulfilled. So I decided to turn to two moms I admire– who discovered hobbies they loved and turned them into something completely life-changing – all while balancing a busy family life.

Discover what moves you

Jill Heupel loved photography from an early age. During college, she worked for a photographer and shot her friends’ engagement pictures for $20 a session. “Taking pictures was something that excited me. Even at that time, I loved the idea that something I did could be a part of someone’s life forever.”

Her love for photography eventually got pushed to the sidelines as she raised her four kids and worked full-time as a social worker. However, Heupel spent her weekends with her camera in hand and edited her work during the week after the kids went to bed. Sticking with her passion paid off – she eventually left her job and launched Jill Heupel Photography full-time, allowing her to pursue photography from a professional standpoint.

Stefani Pollack just happened to stumble upon her pie, er, cupcake. When her friends mentioned purchasing cupcakes for their upcoming wedding, Pollack, who had never baked a cupcake before, offered to whip up the wedding treats.

As she began her pursuit on creating the perfect cupcake, Pollack (pictured at right) chronicled her trials on her blog, Cupcake Project. As her cupcake repertoire began to grow, so did her followers. Within a few years, the cupcake novice became a baking guru and celebrated food writer, honored nationwide for her recipes, wit and creativity.

Cupcake Project opened a new world of self-fulfillment for Pollack. “I learned that my life was missing a creative outlet before the project started. I really needed something that was all my own to find fulfillment in what I do. I never could have expected the energy I get from it or how excited it makes me.”

Make the time

I know what you think, because I think it too. There’s no time to scrapbook or sew when your day is consumed with work and kids and cleaning. Or worse yet, you think you’re shirking your parenting duties if you start training a few hours a week for that 5K you’ve always wanted to run.

“It’s a crazy notion if you think you don’t deserve something for yourself,” remarked Pollack. “Finding a passion that makes you happy will improve your life. You’re not just going to be a happier person, but you’ll be a great role model for your children when they you see you working on something that makes you feel so fulfilled.”

Both Pollack and Heupel agree it’s not always easy, especially with kids in the pictures – there are lots of late nights and multitasking. And both are thankful for supportive spouses who share responsibilities around the home so both partners can pursue their individual dreams.

In the end, the hard work and dedication can pay off - that hobby you love may turn into your ideal career, complete with some pretty sweet benefits.

Said Heupel, who recently opened her own storefront in downtown Edwardsville, “All in all, I get to pick my kids up from school every day. I get to take lunch to my husband once a week. I get to to be the mom that goes on field trips with my kids. I still feel pretty lucky about all of that.”

Keep the fires burning

For Pollack and Heupel, discovering their passions has strengthened their creativity and exposed them to other individuals who are impacted by their work. Even as they have grown their hobbies into thriving businesses, they still experience the same spark they did when Heupel picked up her first camera and Pollack took her first batch of cupcakes out of the oven.

“I definitely feel the same level of excitement I did when I started out, if not more,” remarked Pollack. “I’m able to share my writing with so many people and feed off their excitement. I’ll post a recipe, and someone will bake it within two hours and post a comment. It gives me immediate gratification that my readers are baking these recipes in their own homes. It makes me happy to be able to make someone else happy.”

Heupel continues to keep her work fresh by mixing up her clientele – from family shoots and weddings to product shots and boudoir sessions – and bringing a unique flavor to each session she photographs.

“I also learned that photography can help me heal and process,” she said. “When my Grandpa died five years ago, I found myself reaching for my camera, even at the funeral. I got a picture of my Grandpa’s Veteran flag resting on my Granny’s lap. It’s a picture that hangs in my Mom’s house, as well as many of my relatives’. When I feel something, I reach for my camera, and I would consider myself a pretty emotional girl. I like to feel, and I aim for that in every shoot.”

There are so many things in my head I want to do. I want to run a 5K. I want to take horseback riding lessons. I want to, yes, learn the guitar so I can throw on my aviator sunglasses and break out “Freedom ‘90” at family functions. Now I just need to set my actual Hostess pie on the coffee table, jump off the couch, and make the time to find my “pie.”

So tell us, what is the one thing you’ve wanted to try, but have been holding back?

By Nicole Plegge, Lifestyle Blogger for SmartParenting

Photos courtesy Stefani Pollock

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Metro East mom Nicole Plegge has written for STL Parent for more than 12 years. Besides working as a freelance writer & public relations specialist, and raising two daughters and a husband, Nicole's greatest achievements are finding her misplaced car keys each day and managing to leave the house in a stain-free shirt. Her biggest regret is never being accepted to the Eastland School for Girls. Follow Nicole on Twitter @STLWriterinIL 

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