Two Kisses for Maddy Book Signing in St. Louis

Among the millions of blogs on the Internet, there are few that are the online equivalent of  your neighbor’s front porch - where the host welcomes you with a virtual beer and great music before he whips out photos and stories of his family.

But why Matthew Logelin opened up his online home to the world is bittersweet.

Three years ago, Matt and Liz Logelin welcomed their first child, Madeline, into the world. Twenty-seven hours later, Liz died from a pulmonary embolism, never having the chance to hold her child.

Since then, Logelin has chronicled his life with Maddy through www.mattlogelin.com with the warmth, humor and healthy use of the “F” word, which surprising to him, has garnered followers around the world. On May 4^th, Logelin will bring his story to St. Louis with a reading of Two Kisses for Maddy: A Memoir of Loss & Love, his  New York Times bestseller which hit bookstores this April.

The blog where it began

In the days and weeks after Liz’s death, Logelin turned to his blog to keep family and friends updated on Maddy’s developments. But quickly, the blog became a spot where Logelin, a self-proclaimed non-writer whose professional writing history was limited to “a couple of record reviews,” began pouring out his feelings about the two loves of his life.

It was this heartfelt honesty, with all its highs and lows, that tugged at readers’ heartstrings and created an extended family online – new parents looking for advice on raising a newborn, widows and widowers seeking comfort in a difficult time, and thousands of people across the globe who came to care about a dad and his little girl.

Almost immediately after bringing Maddy home, Logelin began receiving unsolicited gifts and donations on his doorstep from blog readers. Although he’d never asked for financial assistance, readers wanted to do something – anything – to help out. Inspired by these donations and wanting to do something in Liz’s memory, Logelin joined his friends and family in launching The Liz Logelin Foundation, which gives hope to widows and widowers with young families.

“One of the most important things about the Foundation is that it’s open-ended,” remarked Logelin. “I don’t want to get stuck on the ‘traditional’ meaning of a widow or widower. We don’t care whether the committed partners were gay or straight. We care that there was a partnership with two parents and one died, leaving a family behind.”

The Liz Logelin Foundation is different from similar nonprofits. Donations are not allocated toward certain expenses like funerals or bills, but instead, have no restrictions on how they should be spent, a mission that excites Logelin.

“When Liz died, I didn’t want someone to pay my bills; I wanted someone to give me hope. For me, hope didn’t come in the form of ‘money.’ Instead, I wanted to buy music to get through the day. I wanted to get a camera lens to focus on my daughter since my one concern in life was to spend time with her.

"I really find it important that people who are applying for funds don’t have to tell us what they’re using them for. If they want to it for a headstone, that’s fine. Others want to take their kids on vacation or save for their children’s education. What’s important is to help them understand there’s someone else like them, who’s gone through something similar and knows what they’re feeling.”

The next chapter – the book

In 2009, Logelin began work on Two Kisses for Maddy, a journey through his family’s life from his and Liz’s first meeting up through Maddy’s first birthday celebration. The book was not only a way to introduce more readers to his wife, but provided Logelin a well-needed catharsis in which he could release many of the memories he had been holding back from publishing on the blog.

Said Logelin, “I moved to India to write it and finished a third of the book my first seven days there. Those memories had weighed especially heavy on me. Every night when I went to bed, I pictured Liz dead in the hospital bed. When I finally wrote everything down, out of my head and my heart, I felt this is what the book should be about. I don’t have to be uncomfortable about my feelings anymore. For the first time, I slept soundly since the day she died.”

For Logelin, the book has become another way to connect with the widow and widower community. For those who’ve lost a loved one, there’s no guidebook waiting for them when they come home to an empty house. And many self-help, 10-step books, according to an article by Logelin, often seem to be written not for the person who suffered a loss, but rather for friends who are not sure how else to help.

Two Kisses for Maddy is Logelin’s way to show there are “no rules, no guide for dealing with death, dealing with someone’s loss. It comes down to perseverance. If you go through something, you just have to find a way to make it through. The book is to tell a story that just happens to be mine. Here’s a guy who’s just like anyone you would know – I’m not rich, I’m not famous, I’m just a dad who had to focus my attention on my daughter who needed me more than anything.”

Today, Logelin is in what he calls a “great relationship,” and Maddy is getting ready to start preschool in the fall. And at the moment, he’s swept up in the whirlwind that is Two Kisses for Maddy. On Wednesday, May 4, Logelin will do a reading and book signing at the Schlafly Branch of the St. Louis Public Library, 225 N. Euclid Ave., at 7 p.m.

To learn more about Matt and Maddy Logelin, visit www.mattlogelin.com or to purchase the book, check out www.twokissesformaddy.com.

By Nicole Plegge, Lifestyle Blogger for SmartParenting

Matt Logelin photo credit: Ben Parks